You find
a computer
in the woods
with a glow
you feel
under your skin.
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The First Wave.hro
Janice Waters turns on a desk lamp in Akron, Ohio. Heat builds as she surveys her magazine’s galleys. She leaves for a glass of orange juice, and returns to the roar of dark cedar shelves burning up the walls, across the ceiling fan, and onto the door frame that looms over Janice’s mousy blonde head.…
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Cluster.moon
Lately my back’s been hurtin. Maybe it’s all this light I’ve felt in stinging trickles. I think it’s buildin up in there, formin somethin. I don’t know what, I’m gonna need an MRI since the damn aspirin ain’t workin. One month later… Screw me sideways! Well, I got the MRI and they found all that…
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Ain’t We Endless.moon
A priest, a priest, and an atheist walk into a bar. They say to the bartender, “I’ll have a beer.” The bartender says, “Oh, it’s a special night. It’s Wednesd’y. So that’s three bucks a beer.” Priest says, “Ok’y.” Priest says, “Ok’y.” And the atheist says, “Ok’y.” A giraffe walks into the bar and yells,…
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Ghost Smells.mnstr
What most people don’t know is ghosts can still smell. Now, the easiest way to get a ghost to stop haunting your lawn is to spray a perfume—the more pungent, unique, and new the better—all over the spooky fucker, thick as mosquito fog. They’ll snap right out of their time loop shit and move on.…
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Superhero Dream 67.hro
This time it’s space. I am in a dusk parking lot and a man in a yellow tank top with brown curly hair is slamming dents into cars. He moves like gorilla blood. His eyes are lit with pale spots from the streetlights and frenzy. My body points my palms toward him, curls and connects…
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Derek the Shithead Wizard 2.w1z
I did a curse so Derek would get more dong emails than me. For I am Mandy, sparkle-death princess of no-fucks-given. Queen of the darkest shit, with a kick like a snakebite shotgun mounted on a coked up unicorn with fucking flames for a face. Janice flaked like a chode. I shoulda known, though. I…
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Murder Day.moon
Good news! Today, you are allotted unlimited murder.
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Derek the Shithead Wizard 1.w1z
Derek said he’s a wizard now.
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Diary of Hunter Green 16.hro
Dear Diary, Ooooh, man. Rory taught me this phrase yesterday. I texted him about this guy who yelled at me for stepping on his coffee and he said I shoulda told the guy to suck shit. I’ve been going nuts with it. I’ve been all, “Suck shit, you birds!” “Suck shit, you boner drones!” “Suck…
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Mage Lord Ollies the Bropocalypse.w1z
Anomalous activity to record?